My Graceful Transformation has been quite a process, and not always graceful! However, I truly believe that through my struggles (and good times, too), I’ve come out stronger, healthier, and more radiant. Whereas before I thought I should be afraid of my Light, now I am proud and honored to shine my Light as brightly as I can for as many people as I can. If we’d all trust our Lights and turn them on, this world would be a much more pleasant place. What are we waiting for!?
My story is pretty normal and not glamorous at all, but I’ll tell it anyway.
I don’t know when I stopped listening to my heart. Maybe it was when I was about 3 or 4 years old and my family moved from the small town on the North Shore where I was born to Cambridge, MN. My mom told me I got hives when we did that. I remember some things from living in Silver Bay, MN, but I don’t remember ANYTHING about moving. Not getting boxes packed up, not getting into our cars to drive away from home and the hills and the lake, not the moving van, not arriving at our new house in Cambridge. Nothing. Maybe that was the start of it.
The thing about hearts is you can’t actually turn them off. I was always a sensitive child. In fact, my mom has told me more than once that I always had intense emotions and she didn’t really know how to help me. She’s also said I’m wise beyond my years. Others have told me that too. Do I think I am? No. I’m no wiser than anyone else, but I pay attention.
At least, I pay attention now. Our society has its very effective way of shutting down our souls. We do things in such an institutionalized, boxy manner, that we’re basically robots. But we can’t turn off our feelings. Why do you think so many people are on anti-depressants? We are living in a depressing society, and we can’t turn off our feelers. But we try. Oh yes, we try. And lots of people succeed, at least for a time. I sure did. No one ever thought anything was “wrong” with me, though I suffered on a deep level. The thing about being Indigo is that we are angry, but we don’t always know what to do with our rage. Some hide it — I did — even from myself. Basically, I just wanted to feel like I fit in down here — like I was supposed to be here. But almost nothing made sense to me! I did my best to fit into the status quo, and I molded myself to fit right in. But the heart doesn’t lie, and I have been gifted with the ability to hear my heart. While I was shutting it out and listening to what others and society said was “the way,” I struggled. My anger manifested as sadness, depression, anxiety, and despair. Then one day I felt like going to a yoga class.
It was my last year of college, and I found the part of me that transcends anger. It transcends everything. I didn’t know what it was, but I knew it was something. I knew it was something I would continue to pursue my entire life. It was about the only thing that made sense to me. Now I know it was and is my Light. And the more I seek to be this Light, the more I find I am this Light. We all are Lights ~ every single person on this earth ~ no exceptions. It’s just that most people don’t know it, won’t believe it, or haven’t looked. The thing about Light is, the more it shines, the more apparent it becomes in everyone and to everyone. So now my mission is to shine my Light and to help others shine theirs, because the world is ready. It is time.
A quick synopsis of my process:
I learned yoga and was introduced to Kundalini yoga in college. I took a corporate job in a bigger city because, “that’s what you do.” It was awful, with no disrespect to the company–I’m just not supposed to fit into the box it’s in. I learned to teach yoga and during my 200-hr training, I quit that job and took a part time one. A little better, but still not good–not me. I learned Reiki during that job, and I worked as a Reiki practitioner and yoga teacher on the side. Plus I picked up a produce job at the food co-op. I loved it. I started Kundalini Yoga teacher training and quickly quit those jobs. I knew my purpose wasn’t in them, and I decided once and for all to follow my heart. My last adventure has been learning Thai Yoga Bodywork. It’s pretty awesome.
Throughout these trainings and my experiences I learned so many things. I can’t list them all. But some of the more important things:
*I am Indigo (I list this first because it was such a relief to find out why I am the way I am, and that it’s good!)
*To separate myself from my emotions, because I am not them–I am the Light of my soul.
*To find my inner peace even when the world turns upside down.
*To accept myself for everything that I am.
*That I can teach, I am a Teacher, and I can make a positive difference in the lives of others.
*That everything is energy, and that I can align with the energies I choose.
*To accept all for who they are.
*That there are so many ways, and not to judge.
*To allow others the space they need to follow their own paths on their own timelines.
*To give myself the opportunity to step into my power now, when I am ready, not when someone else is.
*To bring awareness, acceptance and forgiveness into my life, to set and affirm powerful intentions, to release all that does not serve my soul, and to surrender to my joy.
*That I have angels, animal spirit guides, and other guides cheering me on and helping me, and that if I ask for it, they can help me even more.
*I still have a heck of a lot to learn and a heck of a lot to do, so I am going to do it joyfully!
Everything I’ve learned and have been through has guided me to create Graceful Transformations. It’s a program that helps people start where they are and become what they are meant to be. It’s about leaving the fear and doubt behind, easing the stress and anxiety, and stepping into your power, your Light. The more we open ourselves to this Light, the more we release limitations and self-defeating subconscious patters. We let go of emotional baggage and the need for outside acknowledgment. We transcend the struggle and start enjoying life instead of trying to somehow get out of being who we are.
So this is where I am on my journey. It’s a pretty amazing experience, and I’m having a blast!